too many reservations, but still so empty

the gravity of it all is pulling me in
...and time is running out like ..like ...like?
cant imagine how people can live in eternal bliss
resistance is futile
but quantum mechanically
perhaps i would be able to tunnel through this shit and make it out as i was
no actually i dont wish i would
rather
to rebound off this potential barrier and fly off backwards at the speed of light
perhaps a little faster
but really
i dont know where it all started
dont know where i should stop either
so maybe
i should just stay rooted to where i am
and keep trying
or
just give it up
but just like running straight at a wall
theres just that little chance that i would be able to make it through
and get the results
years of slacking took its toll
but enough of mediocrity for me (doesn't guarantee it stops coming to me, i think i'm a mediocrity magnet, for success is a word i cannot associate with, in whatever aspect)
all else can wait til after

'think i'm gonna wait til tomorrow'

theres no time to wallow in self pity
just gotta pick myself up and pull those socks up